Hey Girl, Your Phone Is Draining Your Battery

I’m addicted to my device, and it’s killing my mental health.

My phone gives me serious anxiety. When I’m on it and scrolling through social media I feel like I’m not good enough. All of these amazingly dope people I follow are out here killing it with their amazing style, loving husbands, and frequent sponsorships and here I am being average. Every time I get a news alert I heart sinks as I read about politicians in this country who continue to put their personal interests before the well being of their constituents, Even my damn health tracker makes me feel inadequate by reminding my that I have not taken the recommended ten thousand steps that will help me reach my goal weight. It’s exhausting. It’s draining.

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If I’m being completely honest, I spend several hours per day on my phone and the actual value that it adds to my life is zero to none. In an effort to get my life together and feel better I’ve set some ground rules for screen time. Here are my tips to live your best life and treat your phone more like a resource and less like a necessity.

Choose Who You Follow Wisely

I recently cleaned my social media feed and I feel so much better for it. If a person’s posts and content doesn’t inspire me, make me laugh, or make me think, I hit unfollow. If a person’s posts make me feel bad about myself, I unfollow. If a person’s posts bully or demean others, then I probably wasn’t following in the first place. It’s simple. Social media is meant to connect people so we often think of the people we follow as friends but if is a friendship is toxic it’s best to end that relationship.

Designated Phone Free Times

The first half an hour after I wake up and the last half an hour before I go to bed are not for checking social media. This makes for a more peaceful morning and an easier and more restful sleep. I also place my phone face down when interacting with friends and stay off of it while at the movies. Actually enjoying the time spent with the people in front of me has made me realize that I need to be present in my day to day interactions with others.

Check Your Intent

This one is for the influencers and bloggers! Social media is a tool that we all use to promote ourselves and our message. We have all gotten caught in the numbers game. We wonder why we don’t have the followers that would reflect the quality of our content and it can be crippling. It stifles creativity and the content that we make is curated to gain more followers instead of engage the people who are already interested in what we put out there. At this point, you should ask yourself, why am I here? Am i serving a purpose or just playing the numbers game? If you’re only interested in numbers then continue on but if you’re looking to grow organically, stop stressing about it! Keep putting out quality with consistency and stop looking at what everyone else is doing with their feeds. Focusing more on me and what I’m trying to do has relieved so much stress.

Am I a perfect example of how to unplug? Absolutely not. I’m still guilty of getting on my phone to look up something on Google and then find myself scrolling down Instagram’s explore page an hour later but I’m working on it and feel much better for it.

Do you need to unplug? What are your best practices for taking a break from social media?




Reclaiming My Time

Taking a page from the book of Maxine Waters and reclaiming my time.

This is how you stand when someone's wasting your time and you're about to snatch it back.

This is how you stand when someone's wasting your time and you're about to snatch it back.

Last week, Representative Maxine Waters of California pretty much stopped the world when she boldly and unapologetically spoke the now infamous words, "Reclaiming My Time" in an effort to stop a man who was, essentially, trying to waste it. When the offending gentleman protested against this proclamation, Rep. Waters got a bit deeper and explained to him that, "when you are on my time, I can reclaim it". It was at this moment that Black Twitter imploded and the foolery began. With memes, gifs, album covers, and gospel remakes galore the gentlewoman from California basically broke the internet machine a la Beyonce circa 2013. While I participated in the shenanigans and still listen to the gospel remix as part of my morning regimen (because motivation) I started to think about those three words on a deeper level.

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In an effort to live more intentionally and rid myself of some pretty nasty anxiety I've been cutting out things, people, and habits that do not serve a purpose in my life. This means giant closet purges, being disciplined enough to avoid sinkholes that would lead self-destructive behavior (that's a work in progress) and enacting a firm "Stay over there. No, further away, please" policy. Honestly, it's not fun and can feel terribly isolating but I know every time I distance myself from someone or something, I'm making room for something better. With all of these changes, I still find myself feeling like all of my time is being stolen from me. Morning rushes into afternoon and afternoon melts into the night and next thing you know I've gone another day without accomplishing anything meaningful. 

So now, it only makes sense that I reclaim my precious time. You know, that thing you can never get back? As a chronic procrastinator and people pleaser, I watch my time run away from me on a daily basis. Should I do that thing that will actually add value to my life or scroll on Instagram for two and a half hours? That person is calling you again and whats you to basically work for free? Go ahead and answer and tell them yes because people's opinion of you matters. Recently I have come to realize that I am allowed to be selfish and meticulous with my time. Hell, even downright miserly. Because it's mine and when you're on my time I can reclaim it.

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What or who are you reclaiming your time from?

How To Be Basic

Because slaying all day is getting difficult.

Let me count the ways in which I do not slay on a regular basis.

Let me count the ways in which I do not slay on a regular basis.

I could get caught up in trying to live the perfect IG life OR I could actually live.

I could get caught up in trying to live the perfect IG life OR I could actually live.

Oh, you know, just over her not doing the most.

Oh, you know, just over her not doing the most.

Hi, I'm basic. That's really all. I'm not snatched 24/7. My closet isn't a revolving door of Fashion Nova pieces and other fast fashion boutiques (although they DO have some cute clothes). I wear makeup maybe once a week and more often than not my eyebrows look like distant cousins. I don't wear waist trainers because I like to breathe and most importantly EAT comfortably. Sometimes I wear the same shirt three times in a week because washing machines exist. I don't "slay all day". I slay about two percent of the time. I'm pretty okay with that.

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